Wednesday, July 30, 2008

Random Observations

*Have you heard of phantom limb syndrome? I totally have phantom baby
syndrome. I feel like she's still in there. *Isn't it
great to lose twelve pounds in less than a day? *The whole
hospital menu has changed. And it sucks. No more gourmet dinner
either. How I will miss that tira misu.

Tuesday, July 29, 2008

She's Here!!!

Hannah Lynne 8lbs 10oz 12:10 pm. She is gorgeous and nursing like a
champ. 2 pushes and she was out. She looks like Bud.

Monday, July 28, 2008

It's The Final Countdown!!

Can you even believe it?

I started writing about this surprise pregnancy in November and by this time tomorrow, it will be over. While going by, it was excruciatingly slow, but now it seems to have gone so fast!! It's crazy!

It all started with me crying hysterically on the day after Thanksgiving, to find a brand new Kitchenaid Mixer in my cupboard. (I maintain that I would have cried over the Kitchenaid regardless of hormones) and Swistle called it even before I did.

There was the nausea.
There were migraines, some of the worst I've ever had, and I am a migraine person.
There were the (way too many) jerky outbursts at work. (ok, here at home too)

But also, there were all of you. So many of you who were there for me on a daily basis, so many who laughed and cried right along with me. I don't know what I would have done without all of you. Honestly----the majority of you are linked to the left. The personal emails outside of the comments, always knowing the right thing to guys really are the greatest.

This is what's different about the internets---I wouldn't call my best girlfriend and tell her all of this crap day after day. But you're here. You listen. Again, the greatest.

So enough of the mush, right? (Trust me, the mush will be gone in approximately 18 hours)

How am I feeling???


I think I'd prefer to not know the date our baby would be born. With Bud we went in for our regular appointment and were told 'he's huge, today is the day.' Lucy came on her own early, because, well, she's Lucy and is full of surprises. Having a for certain expiration date is stressful to a degree that I can not even explain. People who have scheduled c-sections and whatnot....I just don't know how they deal knowing months in advance what I have known for a week. Hub compares it to knowing the date you are going to die. For real. Just TMI.

But at least I was able to get a good nap in today, knowing full well that I will not sleep for another 2 years (a 3 hour nap will totally offset the 2 years, right?) And at least the kids know exactly what is happening.

There's no getting out of it now, right?

Wish me luck ok? And if you're the praying type do that too. I really am freaking out.

I'm hoping to Tweet from the hospital as well as do a mobile post with her stats. Pictures will come later though; I plan on being home sometime on Thursday and who knows when I'll get on the actual computer.

Much love to you internets. :)


Friday, July 25, 2008

What Actually Happened & BONUS Family Photo Horror

Oh, hi there! It's me....the one who could have had her baby yesterday, but panicked and high-tailed it out of the hospital.

We had our portraits done at 3PM yesterday and then I dropped Hub, and the kids off at Tae Kwon Do while I ran over to the bank and the grocery store for dinner. It was raining pretty badly and on my way in to the store I noticed how slippery the bottoms of my flip-flops flt on the painted crosswalk in the parking lot. I made sure to take extra care on my way out, as it was still pouring, but then, out of the blue, I was on the ground on my hands and knees. I'm still not actually sure what happened, but the feeling in my ankle would suggest that somehow it twisted and I lost my balance. A woman ran over to help me up as I was in the middle of the crosswalk, and cars passing by just stared. I was mortified. I insisted I was OK, and let her help me back to my car, where I sat and shook for a few minutes before heading back over to TKD.

It didn't really occur to me to call the doctor right away, but after being home for a bit, and having had contractions since the time I fell, I decided to call just to see. She was concerned about placental abruption, so suggested that I go in and get checked out. Which I did. The on call doctor was nice, the first man-OB I've ever dealt with, but it was no big deal. He checked me out, ran a whole bunch of tests, and I contracted every 5 minutes the entire time. The nurses had told me that since my cervix wasn't changing from the contractions, they'd probably send me home. I thought I was disappointed.

Hub left for a bit to go set his employee up at a job since I was just laying there anyway, waiting for test results. The doctor, nurse and med student came in soon after all "so, how do YOU feel?? Do you think you're in labor??? What do you think you want to do????" and so on. It was as if they were saying "We're not going to say let's induce right now, but if you say the word, we will." I told them I felt trapped, and weird and that they were really freaking me out. The doctor said "Bottom line, we can get things going if you want to but who knows how long it will take. If I were you, I would go home, eat something (because I hadn't) and sleep and see how things play out." So that's what I chose to do.

Which is why I'm not complaining about still being pregnant today because it's my own damn fault.


I hate our family photos. Actually, I like the way that I look in one of them, but the rest of the family looks like a bunch of dolts. The others, they look OK and I look like death. Lucy was difficult for most of them as evidenced by her fake forced smile, and somehow Bud channeled an old man. We ordered only the family shot of all of us head on, and the one of the kids back to back. The one of us all sideways is the one that I actually like. So here they are in no particular order....

Thursday, July 24, 2008

I'm Home

They would have kept me and let me have her if I wanted to, but I 1.
freaked out and 2. wanted to eat and sleep, neither of which were
happening there. I am 3cm though and 60% effaced. Regular doctor's
appointment tomorrow at 9. This concludes Saly's updates via phone
for this evening.

Updating from the Hospital

We are probably not here to stay since my contractions are not super
strong though they are regular. We decided to get checked out just in
case and we are waiting for blood work. They are checking me again in
about an hour to see if anything has changed. I'll let ya know. Also
my effing Twitter isn't working...FYI.


I slipped and fell in the grocery store parking lot. I am wet and
sore and can not go in to TKD because i'm reasonably sure I peed my
pants. Glamour my friends, glamour.

Wednesday, July 23, 2008

Then and Now

The first time, I was scared of everything. The entire process of labor and delivery, having an epidural, getting an IV for the first time, what if I pooped on the table???. You name it; I was terrified. I knew that labor and delivery was inevidible though I plugged along pretending that it was no big deal. It was no surprise that I had a nervous breakdown upon hearing that I was 5cm and needed to get to the hospital so they could make me contract. Screaming sobbing incoherent breakdown, mind you, and I think that if I had carried on any longer, Hub would have smacked me. Everything happened though. Sure, the 1st IV didn't take and my vien burst. Sure, they gave me way too much pitocin and I was in agony. Sure, I pushed for 4 hours, so hard that muscles I didn't even know I had ached. And sure, I ripped, tore and was cut and had a zillion stitches but really, before I knew it, it was over and I was eating the best chicken salad sandwich of my life while my baby boy was being cleaned up and brought to me for the first time.

The second time was not so scary. While I never bought in to (and I still don't) that crap about "as soon as the baby is out, you forget it all", at least I knew what to expect. I knew the doctor and midwife, the hospital, the labor and delivery process.....I was golden. Until I went in to labor a whole lot quicker than I'd expected to. Until my body started pushing our baby girl out involuntarily as the epidural was being placed. Until I pushed said baby out with no drugs. Until she was sick and unable to room with me; unable to bond with me....or I with her. Until I went through the worst period of depression I have ever gone through. Until I thought "Oh my God, what if I never love her?" It took 2 months---until she was hospitalized for an infection, and we finally bonded...3 days in the hospital together as it should have been to begin with. And indeed, everything was just fine.

This time, has been scary. It's definitely the hardest pregnancy I've endured. I worry about her blood sugar and being seperated from her in the hospital. I worry about our change in family dynamic; mostly the impact of changing Lucy from baby to middle child. I worry about the possibility of a c-section, and recovery. I worry about being responsible for 3 young children and I wonder how I will ever do it. The time....the money....the energy. It will be fine though, right? We'll make it through just as we did before? We will, right?

Tomorrow we will be going for a family portrait; the four of us for the very last time. And within the next six days, our family will change--a new baby girl. Taking us from four to five. Changing all of our lives forever.

For the better.

Monday, July 21, 2008

I noticed a really big difference in procedure on Friday, when comparing my new(er) OBGYN to the one who delivered Bud and Lucy. We were discussing how big Olivia currently is, and how I pushed with Bud for 4 hours and ended up needing a vacuum to get him out. To say that my current doctor was horrified was an understatement. Old practice was a very holistic doctor and 2 midwives (all of whom have left which is why I left) and new practice is 3 youngish (30-40) straight up doctors. Current doctor let me know in no uncertain terms that in the case of Bud, she would have performed a c-section with no questions asked AND in the case of Olivia, the second she has a concern, a c-section it will be. My feelings? I've already pushed out 2 9-10lb babies, one with no epidural, and the largest one was posterior. Unless she is breech or in distress, there will be no c-section. (Even if it does mean that I get to stay in the hospital longer)

We had a busy weekend, and I can say with 98% certainty that we are ready for the baby. Bassinet and car seat are set. We bought diapers yesterday ($37 for 216 size 1 diapers= $.17 a piece. Am I really that tied to Pampers Swaddlers?? I am.) and the house is reasonably clean. Regardless of anything, no matter what, in one week and one day, we will have a new baby.

Hub and I discussed the difference in knowing when you are having the baby vs. not knowing. His biggest disappointment? No action shot of me before we leave for the hospital. I thought about showing them to you....but they are not good. So just imagine me post nervous breakdown upon hearing that I was 5cm and must go be induced for Bud and then in hardcore active labor with Lucy, standing in the kitchen, sweaty and sullen at 3AM.

As much as I have been miserable, I am going to miss feeling this baby girl wiggling around in my belly. I'm trying to remember that and be positive in this last week. I can't believe this has been going on since November....and now we're here.

Saturday, July 19, 2008


Well, I am 2cm. If nothing happens before, we will induce on 7/29.
Car seat is in and everything is ready. I suppose now we just wait.
Yesterday was a really shitty day & today has started off the same.
Here's to hoping it gets a little better.

Wednesday, July 16, 2008

37 Weeks

I did way too much these past few days. It started with folding every last piece of laundry in the house on Monday. You know me, right? I hate laundry. I would rather die a fiery death than do laundry. But it's done and I have kept going. As soon as there is a load, it is washed, dried and folded. Creepiest form of nesting EVER. Hub shot me a funny look a I was classifying our bibs and burp cloths. A system is needed, and it is a very simple one---house bibs/cloths VS. going out bibs/cloths. What's not to get?

Bud had a Tae Kwon Do test on Monday as well, so I picked the kids up and headed to that and then went to far as to take them to McDonald's (with play place) and spend an hour. Needless to say, I was exhausted.

Tuesday the kids were home, and Hub had worked late overnight, so I go them out of the house pretty early on. We went to Target, the bank and then to the pool, which again, was exhausting. The cool water did help my ankle though, so there's a plus. I passed out on the couch while they napped and before I knew it, it was 4:30 and time to get Bud ready for Tae Kwon Do. FIL took him and Lucy and I went shopping for dinner. I have no interest in food, so I cooked some beef tips and we had them over salad with dinner rolls, and that was that.

I had a really hard time sleeping last night and woke up very sore this morning, but got the kids off to school, had some breakfast and then tore apart our room to make room for the bassinet, rearranged the kids' room, and of course, more laundry. Hub was leaving again for a long trip tonight, so we grabbed some Chinese food for lunch and I brought him back home to sleep while I ran some errands.

The good news is that I finally bought the items for my pif contest. The bad news is that I don't know when I'll get to the post office. I actually had an episode in Target that leaves me wary of going out on my own. There was horrible cramping---not even contractions, just weird cramping up my whole stomach. I sat down near the pharmacy for what seemed like hours and finally made my way to the back of he store to get some water. I'm sure it was dehydration---coffee, Pepsi and Chinese food tend to deplete my water supply. Thankfully, the water helped and I was able to finish my shopping, but man did I ever panic. More good news: I found a lightweight robe for the hospital and I got some good snacks for my hospital bag.

I grabbed the kids and fed them dinner, and I made a lime jello pie, which just now served as my dinner. (not the whole thing though....)

Soon I will be going to bed. I'm hoping to take it easy tomorrow, though there is still much to be done. If nothing else, I want to get the car seat in and the bassinet all set upstairs. And take a really good nap.

I will likely be scarce tomorrow, but will update after my doctor's appointment on Friday. Don't go panicking if I'm not around. I'll post a twitter if I'm giving birth. (That's right Shelly, you smart-ass. Maybe I WILL twitter the whole play by play.)

Finally----is anyone interested in doing a guest post or 2 over here while I am laid up in the hospital/recovering at home post-partum? Let me know.

Until we meet again.....

Monday, July 14, 2008

W I N N E R ! ! ! ! (and baby update....)

I was not even a little bit surprised that the winner of last week's contest was who she was. And sorry, Tessie it's not you. But thanks for wishing like, an 11lb baby on me.

The winner actually is my good blogging friend Misty, who consistently is on the same wavelength as I am. Not only was she 100% on with the size and cm, but she left her comment within minutes of the ultrasound tech giving us the results. Crazy, right?

So, I will have 2 prizes in the mail this week. (Sorry for my tardiness, Sarah)

Aaaaanyhooo, what were the results?? As of Friday, baby weighed in at 7lbs 14ounces and I am 1.5 cm. Of course after what I ate this weekend, she could very well weigh 10lbs by now. The doctor has changed her tune to you've proved that you can birth a big baby, so let's wait til 39-weeks. Um, whatever.

LoriD wanted to know how I felt about that, and part of me is disappointed. BUT! If we were going at 38 weeks, that would mean 1 week until baby time. Yeah, I can't have a baby in a week!!! I need at least 2!! I need like 5 more!!! Ok, not really, but when it creeps up on you, it is a bit scary.

Sadly, sitting home all day is not giving me much blog fodder. I do have a meme to do, so maybe I'll get to that tonight. For now, I am folding 986 burp cloths and 347 bibs. Send help and booze. kthanksbai!

Saturday, July 12, 2008

Quick Update

*baby is still most definitely a girl---the tech pointed out "her area" and referred to it as a hamburger bun. Which was weirdly uncomfortable.
*we got some really good shots of her face, which is chubby to say the least. And she definitely has Hub's lips (so do Lucy and Bud---big, full lips)
*I have a UTI!! But the meds are actually letting me pee productively, which is a huge relief. (pun intended--I slay me!!!)
*her head is down, but her feet are curled up around her head, whatever that means.
*we are opting to probably wait one more week to have her---unless she comes on her own first, putting us at 7/28. This decision was made pre-sonogram, so don't go changing your answers.
*She will be a big healthy girl, fo sho!
*I have way too much work to do to be screwing around on the computer, so off I go.

Thursday, July 10, 2008

Random Crap, Contest Photos and New X-tra Fun Contest!!

Ah, so let's dig ourselves out of the hole, shall we? Yesterday's post was dismal, huh? That's how I felt though. That's how I feel at the end. I meant it when I said it was worse than post-partum for me.

Things are better; things always are by the light of day. A few bad nights doesn't make me a bad mom. It tends to make me feel bad; but I know I am not actually horrible. I don't know.

Let's back track a bit!!

I took the kiddos to the community pool on Tuesday and they had a really good time. I ran out of sunscreen just as I was finishing Bud, so that left me bare, and I did end up with a bit of a burn. I look healthy now though, despite the potential cancer and whatnot. Besides, it was worth it for the fun the kiddos had.

Yesterday, I shopped for baby items and nursing bras. Then I got a pedicure in a trashy hot-pink shade called "Bimbo Limbo". I love it. I worked around the house for a bit in the afternoon/early evening and then played Wii for a bit after my temper tantrum.

We got up early and went o the park today to scope it out for Lucy's upcoming birthday. Hub and I got coffee and breakfast on the way (it's about a 45 minute drive to this great park, where we also used to camp), and we all had a picnic lunch before heading home. It was a really nice time.


My package from Swistle arrived yesterday and it was full of great stuff, as well as notes about where most of it came from. It was awesome.

It included a blanket, cardigan, sleeper and adorable sandals for baby, some animal trading cards---2 sets EXACTLY the same for Bud and Lucy, A Teeny Bopper Beany which Lucy has not put down, a Halloween costume, and the reusable target bags---which I do not believe are sold here. (Those are Lucy's toes in the photo; Swistle did not ship me toddler toes.)

Then there was this, my favorite thing. I actually said out loud: "Is this from the MIL set????" Indeed, it is, and it is gorgeous. I love it.

Thanks Swistle!!!

Now then, of course I have to pay it forward, an lets not do any of that random crap unless it's necessary. Here's what I want to do:

My tell-all appointment is tomorrow. We will find out if/how much I am dilated as well as get an estimate via sonogram of how big the baby is. Whoever is the closes on the CM and size wins!!

To help you out:

*Tomorrow I will be 36 weeks and 3 days pregnant
*I was 2cm with Bud for the last 5 weeks of pregnancy.
*I did not dilate until 38 weeks with Lucy and was 3cm the day before I went in to labor.
*I have measured about 2 weeks ahead of schedule size-wise since about 20-weeks.
*Bud was born at 40 weeks and 3 days at 10lbs 2oz
*Lucy was born at 38 weeks and 1 day at 9lbs 5oz.

So go!! Make your guesses! Really, it is anyone's game. You will have until 11:59PM (eastern time) on Saturday 7/12 to enter. I will announce a winner on Sunday.

OK, I feel a bit better now and I'm off to bed. Big day tomorrow!! If you aren't entering and must know how things went, shoot me an email.

Win The Essential Baby Wearing Stash!!

I would just die to win this one!!!

Wednesday, July 9, 2008

Why she's not posting. . .

The kids are out of control. As soon as Hub leaves, they stop
listening. I turn in to this screaming lunatic and then bawl Like
crazy once they are in bed. I hate this.
Then there's the sunburn. And the exhaustion. And the
whole 'getting ready for baby' thing.
I feel tested and burnt out.
And that's why I'm not posting.

Tuesday, July 8, 2008

Ok, Ok. . .

I am on TWITTER. You all are a bad influence!!

Monday, July 7, 2008

Status Updates I Could have posted to Facebook, but Saved for Here


...mysteriously has only one swollen ankle. Or Kankle. glad that the third time around, she remembers that all of the hair she has grown on her belly does go away.

...practiced really great parenting on the 4th of July.

...had happy kids over the holiday weekend.

...doesn't think that the Jon and Kate Plus 8 music video should make her blubber like a baby, but somehow, it does. deathly afraid of water, and projected such fears on to her children. She eventually gave in though, and Bud lived.

...doesn't give a rat's ass about "his needs" when she is 36-weeks pregnant. 36 weeks pregnant!!!! Her belly is bigger than her boobs!!

...looks like a sumo wrestler (with great hair).

...coughed so hard in the middle of the night that she threw up on the living room carpet. Cleaning up your own vomit at 2AM is very glamorous. embarrassed when Lucy uses baby talk. Not because it's stupid and annoying (which it is), but because she wants everyone to know how smart and well spoken her 3-year-old actually is. maybe a little bit shallow.

...definitely needs more sleep.

...can't wait to meet her new baby girl.

Saturday, July 5, 2008


WOW, can you believe all of these contests??? Can you believe it's winning time already? CAN YOU BELIEVE THAT I WON SWISTLE'S CONTEST?????? (also can you believe that I will be hosting yet another contest, while I'm likely sleep deprived and post-partum?) Those mixed cd's I referenced may just come in handy. Or the prize may be me singing karaoke from bed or something. I just don't know.

But are here to see who won, no?

DRUM ROLL PLEASE..... chose comment number 24, who just so happens to be Semi-Desperate Housewife. YAY!! I am excited for her! I am excited for all of us!! I am emailing her now!!!!

Thursday, July 3, 2008

Dying from the Cuteness!!

This was one of the gifts I got yesterday---I actually bough the same dress in green for my girlfriend.

I am in love with brown!!!

These are hand-me-downs from a friend---but her daughter never wore them.

Yes, NIKE Booties!!

Today is my first official day home and I am washing baby clothes and taking it easy as my hip has decided to completely give out. I'm not complaining though, since, like I said, NO WORK!!

Construction has completely begun out front and our sidewalks and driveway were the first to go. I am trapped in the driveway until lunch time. I have no plans until this afternoon though, so it is all good!

I can't belive it is only 9:45; the kids were up at 6:30. I am ready for MY nap!!

Finally, I am totally not used to our keyboard at home; it is way less sensitive than mine at work so a lot of my words are ending up with missing letters. Hopefully, spell heck is working!

Wednesday, July 2, 2008


*I'm officially done working! Huge sigh of relief.
*My employees surprised me with cake, coffee, and a gift of
some baby clothes. *Then I had contractions every ten minutes
for 2 hours...until I realized that I had not had any water today.
*All is well now; I am looking forward to the next few

Tuesday, July 1, 2008

Mish Mosh

• I think that my blog is officially like “What the hell??” after receiving 40 comments yesterday and double that in hits. This contest thing is kind of weird. All of these bloggers that I’ve “seen around” but never visited were at my blog yesterday, and I was at theirs. It was like a mixer of sorts, huh?
• Though I usually do their shoe shopping on my own, I took Bud and Lucy with me last night so that they could try things on. Things were ok while I was taking care of Lucy, who ended up with some light-up princess sandals and a cute pair of pink Mary Jane style sneakers. Bud ran up and down the aisles a bit, but overall, he was manageable. While trying to find him a new pair of sneakers though, Lucy was a tyrant. Running, screaming, pulling things off of shelves—you name it. She was completely out of my control. Finally, she knocked a garbage can over causing a huge crash and then started screaming and crying “I’m sorry Mama!!” over and over again while flailing her arms in an all out freak-fest. The way she behaved you would think that she received regular beatings or something. She finally calmed down and then she and Bud locked the doors and put down the door stops while I was paying at which point the store manager yelled at them and gave me a dirty look. I can never go back there again. Lesson learned—we went right from school. I totally should have fed them first.
• Bud got a pair of Spiderman sandals, by the way, but no sneakers. I don’t know what it is about size 11.5, which is what he has worn for nearly a year. I can never find anything. (unless it’s really ugly) So I guess I’ll be checking out Target or something for new sneakers because he needs them for school.
• Things I have said in the last 2 days that I never thought I would: “Please take your mouth off of the garbage can!!” and “Why are your sneakers in the cupboard next to my clean plates?” (The answer was “So Lucy can’t find them and put them on……”) OMG.
• For Bud, today was the best day ever because they started work on our street. The equipment has been there since Friday, but this morning they actually started working……at 6AM. I was up already, but Bud came out of his room screaming “Mommy!! The back hoe!! The digger!!! A FORKLIFT!!!” They also put their outhouse on my neighbor’s lawn right across the street. She must be loving that. The good about this? We are getting a brand new street with proper drainage, new water lines to support sump pumps, brand new 4-foot wide cement sidewalks, and a tree out front. The bad? We can not park on the street (or in our driveways if we’d like to leave during the day) from like 7AM to 7PM. We live one house from the corner and Hub is going to ask our neighbor whose driveway is just around the corner if I could maybe park there during the day so that I don’t have to park at Walgreens or around the block or something.
• Did I mention that today is my actual last full day of work??? OMG!! There is so much to do!! We are having a baby!!!