Since I Don't Blog Anymore-Christmas Meme

I stole this one from Swistle and Jess, and a million other people.

 

Eggnog or hot chocolate? I would imagine that if I had ever tried eggnog, I would like it very much.  I don’t usually do cocoa, and don’t consider it to be a holiday drink. 

Does Santa wrap the presents or leave them open under the tree? Santa wraps them and puts them under the tree.  I don’t know how much longer that will go on for because our nearly-6-yo is on to us.  We’ve never really pushed the whole Santa thing anyway, and we don’t use that whole Santa is watching BS to get our kids to behave. 

Colored lights on a tree or white? Colored.  I do like the white though too.

Do you hang mistletoe? No.

When do you put your decorations up? Usually the weekend after Thanksgiving

What is your favorite holiday dish? Pierogies

Do you open a gift on Christmas Eve? We go to Hub’s cousin’s house on Christmas Eve and the kids get a few gifts there, so those, they open.  I give them new (matching) pajamas for Christmas Eve as well, but they aren’t considered gifts, and they are in their dressers now. 

How do you decorate your Christmas tree? We have a huge mishmash of ornaments; Hub’s mom and his grandmother made him one for every year of his life (a tradition that we’ve kept for our own kids, except that we buy an ornament to represent their personality for the year and we label it with their name and the year), hand blown ornaments from Hub’s dad’s childhood, and some favorites we bought for our first tree.  Also, colored lights.  We found a strand of lifesavers in Hub’s mom’s things—that will be on the tree next year. 

Snow: love it or hate it? I don’t mind it at all.  I don’t mind driving in it either.  I do hate it when it gets black and dirty from the cars though.  And I hate when inconsiderate people track it in to my house. 

Can you ice skate? Have you met me??  That would be no.

What is your favorite holiday dessert? Cut-out cookies.  No contest.  But I am a dessert sort of person, so I love it ALL.

What is your favorite holiday tradition? After opening gifts with the kids, my parents and our brothers come over (and til now, Hub’s mom too) and we cook them brunch.  They sit with the kids and open their gifts while we cook and do other things.

 

Candy canes: yum or yuck? Take ‘em or leave ‘em

Favorite Christmas show? A Christmas Story.  We start watching it on Christmas Eve and continue through the weekend.  The kids also really like Shrek the Halls.  Fun Facts: I have never seen It’s a Wonderful Life and I LOATHE Peanuts Christmas.

 

Hard as I try, I can not catch up on all the blogging. I have 236 unread items in my reader, and I think I will have to mark them all as read. This pains me. I’m the girl who can’t have an unread email without totally tweaking. TOTALLY TWEAKING. But alas, I will likely skim. And then mark as read. Hmph.

The last few weeks have been insanely busy. Transition at work, Thanksgiving, and now the bustle of Christmas. We cut down our own tree this year, and well, I don’t see what the big deal was. It was muddy and annoying. Plus I had to carry the baby. OMG, it sucked. But the tree is pretty, and hopefully tonight, it will be in the house and we can decorate it.

I shared Bud’s school picture with you a few weeks ago. So now I must share Lucy’s. No, this is not her senior portrait; it is her preschool photo. She is something else, huh?


Here is Liv too:



I hope the season finds you all well and I hope to catch up soon!!

Friday Free for All- handwritten (click to enlarge)

Well everyone else has done it, so why not me??

I am SO over this week!!

Ok, so seriously, I am exhausted. 3 nights ago, Liv slept through the whole night with nary a peep. 2 nights ago she was up screaming at the top of her lungs every.fifteen.minutes until I finally brought her out on the couch with me. Last night it was every few hours and she ended up in bed with us. I have been up since 3am. When will this ever end?

I am starting to believe that as long as she is under our roof, she will never sleep, never stop with the incessant screeching, and will never be off the bottle. This girl. She is destroying my will to live.

It helps some to read Sundry who has the same sort of issues going on at her house. The difference is that our house is very very small. And to let her scream, when the other children have school in the morning, well, that is just not going to happen. So I go to her in the middle of the night, and I calm her. Change her diaper. Get her the bottle she asks for. Pick up her teetee (her blanket) for the 100-millionth time. And I deal with it.

But damn if it isn’t wearing me thin.

The lack of sleep has made me very crabby, and it took every ounce of self control I had to not punch this lady at the portrait studio the other day. I arrived with the children 20 minutes before our scheduled appointment. The lady from the previous appointment was selecting her photos. I got checked in, and took the kids for a walk in the store and picked up a few things that we needed. We came back right at 4:30, and Lady was still picking her photos. She continued to select them, sheet by sheet, until 4:50. So at the very least, she had spent 40 minutes picking out photos. While I waited with 3 children who were getting more and more antsy by the second. I partly blame the studio, because they took over 100 shots [there was an outfit change involved (in my short session alone, they took 45 shots)] but really, this bitch just had no regard for any of us. I was livid!!! And when she left, she made no apologies, just breezed on out of there, her pocket $129 lighter (thank you very much) and just left. I mean GOD!

The only reason we were at this particular studio was because I bought a $10 package while out shopping a few weeks ago, and it was a ridiculous amount of photos for not a lot of money. I realized that they would try and suck me in to buying more photos. I bought not one other photo. I can not get past this. Everything aside though, the photos turned out very well—and I give anyone kudos who can get 3 kids to smile and look at the camera all at the same time. I think I am kind of done with studios though. I’d like to find a nice private photographer.

And speaking of photos, we got Bud’s school photos back last week, and when I opened them, my breath actually caught in my throat. Then I immediately burst in to tears. I know; lame. But there was this KID staring at me! Not my baby boy; a KID!! So yeah, I cried over how fast the time has gone by, and how before I know it I’ll be opening his senior portrait package (yes, I know he’s in kindergarten).

Anyway…look at my KID!

Happy Halloween! (it was)

It was the coldest Halloween we’ve had in years, but it went off (pretty much) without a hitch. Lucy was crabby that she had to wear pants under her Tinkerbell costume, (but felt better wearing her rain boots and winter hat that is covered in peace signs). Bud, who was recovering from H1N1, tired quickly. I dug out an old costume for my niece, Sam, whose did not have one. And Liv? Well, she was the happiest baby in town! Maybe it’s a fluke, but her surgery has really seemed tom make a difference. Just look at that face!!



We got a ton of candy, and the kids had a fantastic time. Liv was thrilled to be part of what the big kids were doing, until she tripped on her dress and smashed her nose in to someone’s porch. We saw many of Bud’s school friends, who were thrilled that he was out and feeling better. Lucy took inventory of all of her candy, which was crazy funny. After every house she said “Mama, look! I got some M&M’s!” and so on. And like I said, Bud tired quickly, but he was a good sport. Hub and I had a great time following behind him because his costume, which was the same he wore last year (his choice) was a bit tight, especially with the sweats I made him wear underneath for warmth. His pants bell bottomed out a bit at the bottom. Hub kept making comments like “Abba called, they want their outfit back”.

I was happy to be out with my kiddos. And to be wearing my new Ugg boots. (that shipped from China, but that is a story for another day)

Ear tube day

Does this work? The baby had tubes put in her ears this morning and she did great. She is being her regular old self.
Sent on the Sprint® Now Network from my BlackBerry®

Rambling and Rambling some more

I am having a major PMS-fueled salt crisis. I just thought you should know that. I’m back at work today after a week off, and as always, it feels like I never left. My vacation was ok. Hub and I got a lot of work done in the basement and I think I am finally ready to begin listing clothes on Ebay. Of course, getting rid of anything child related gives me the major nervous tummy. I feel like as soon as everything is gone, I will miraculously get pregnant. Time will only tell, I suppose.

In unrelated news, I took my very first “dud” pregnancy test last week. I’ve never had one completely not register. And then I didn’t have to pee anymore, so we had to wait until the next day to do it again, and holy crap what a lot of mother effing stress. The result was negative and I pretty much knew that it would be but my cycle was crazy last month, I am assuming because of the pneumonia and antibiotics and all of that crap and even though I had a (very very short and light) period, I still felt really off. And well, I did not want to go off on my weekend getaway with the Hub and drink myself in to a stupor enjoy some wine if there was any question in my mind, you know? So I tested and it was negative. And there is no baby to speak of---although I had a dream that I was pregnant with my fourth child and shopping and talking to a friend the day before my induction date. And aren’t those the weirdest dreams? Where you wake up feeling like it was so real, but you know that it wasn’t? I don’t know. I hate it when my head and my hormones fuck with me.

So anyway, Wednesday was my 28th 29th 30th 31st birthday and we didn’t really do much of anything. Hub, FIL and I went to The Olive Garden for lunch, and then we had chocolate cake after the kids had dinner. I was proclaimed “the best mom EVER” because I asked for chocolate cake with chocolate frosting. This is what you do as a mom—order the damn chocolate chocolate when you would really prefer white and buttercream. Whatever. It’s cake.

So my parents took the kids on Friday night so Hub and I could do our whole overnight thing, and it was good. We stayed here and had a fantastic dinner and overnight stay. I think that maybe I would like to die and be buried in their Jacuzzi tub. It was nice. Dinner was fantastic! And when they brought out the coffee with dessert, it came with a tray of chocolate shavings and real whipped cream, and heavy cream for stirring in to the coffee. That could have been my dessert right there, man. It was awesome.

I only realized the following evening that it was the first night I ever spent away from Liv, and I promptly burst in to tears. I know. Talk about crazy. I mean, we were home already. I’d spent the whole day with her. But for whatever reason, it hit me kind of hard.

Well I have rambled enough for one day. Plus I need to lick the salt off of the inside of this Chex Mix bag.

October

I was sure that I would have photos from our weekend downloaded by now, but I don’t. This pneumonia is still kicking my ass something fierce. By the time I have worked and picked up the children and have taken care of baths and homework, I am completely wiped. We are going on 3 weeks now, and while I do feel a bit better, I definitely don’t feel normal. Thankfully, I have a vacation next week, and hopefully I will be able to rest up and finally feel better.

This was a sort of unplanned vacation. I was on vacation in July when MIL passed away, and was able to convert those days to bereavement, thereby giving me a few days back. The week of Columbus Day seemed as good a time as any—because of the holiday, I only have to use 4 days, AND Wednesday just happens to be my birthday. So, a vacation I will take. We aren’t going anywhere, and I actually signed Bud up for camp on the holiday so that all 3 kids will be out of the house and Hub and I can finally catch up on housework and some general organization. Bud has school the rest of the week, and the girls will follow their normal grandma’s/daycare routine.

I originally had plans for Friday, which is the girls’ normal day home with Hub, to meet up with a friend and her 2 girls, but my husband made other plans for us. It was funny because I had just been checking out this new boutique hotel and restaurant online, and called him to drop a hint about the dinner for 2/overnight stay/breakfast for 2 packages they have. I casually mentioned it and he was silent. “Sara”, he said, “I just pulled out of their parking lot…” ESP much? So we are doing that Friday over Saturday while the children spend the night with Grandma and Papa. I’m excited about it. It will be the 1st time that all 3 kids have spent the night with them, but I am sure that it will be just fine.

Lets be honest, the gift is as much for Hub as it is for me, but I am looking forward to a fancy dinner, and sleeping in a fancy room without worrying whether the kids will be up screaming at some point. I am looking forward to rolling out of bed when I want to get up and having breakfast at my leisure. And sure, I could do that in the comfort of my own home while they are away, but the hotel makes it kind of special right?

I just might go out and buy a new dress for the occasion.

Eat it....just eat it....

I have to admit that I may have been a bit arrogant in the past about my children’s eating habits. Upon hearing stories about a child refusing to eat anything but say, a cheese quesadilla for dinner, for nights on end. I’d scoff to myself “it’s because that is what you let him do…”.

Here is a list of things that Liv will eat consistently:
• Cantaloupe
• Cheerios
• That.Is.All.

I don’t know what to do about it. I give her just about everything we eat. And after a bite or 2, she is spitting it out. Not even maliciously spitting, just casually opening her mouth and letting the offender fall out. I don’t know if it is her molars, or her ears (did I mention she has a consult for tubes at the end of the month), or if she is just being picky, or what. What I do know is that by the time my other children were here age, they were not still taking 3-4 bottles a day and they most certainly were eating a wide variety of table food. And up until recently, Liv was too. She loved to eat. LOVED. Now, not so much. And I am lost as to what to do. My only saving grace is to give her a fork with whatever we are eating, and she does eat some of it until the novelty of the fork wears off.

For now, I am discounting it as a phase, and loading her up on cantaloupe.

She’s lucky she is cute.

Friday Free for All- Random Schtuff

• I have pneumonia. Very fun times around here, let me tell you. I did (finally—after almost 2 weeks) go to the doctor yesterday and got myself some antibiotics, an inhaler and a chest x-ray. I already feel 100 times better.
• We are making our annual outing to Letchworth State Park tomorrow, one week earlier than normal, and meeting up with some family for a picnic. I am excited for family fun, but also to go and take our Annual Autumn Photo. I hope that the weather holds out for us.
• I had to overcome serious Nervous Tummy last week to tell a strange lady that she was walking in to the men’s room. In addition to NT, I have a crazy fear of walking in to the men’s bathroom by mistake. So that won out and I averted a crisis for this poor lady.
• Bud had an altercation with a boy on the bus. The boy stuck his finger in his face and told him that he was not his friend. Bud bit his finger. When we talked to him about it, he told us that his feelings were hurt that the boy did not want to be his friend; a new feeling for him because is daycare and preschool, he was the kid everybody wanted to be friends with. I was torn between being pissed that Bud would bite anyone, and having my own feelings hurt because his feelings were hurt. Hub made him go across the street and apologize and the bus driver agreed not to report it to the school—otherwise, he would be kicked off the bus. It is so hard to be a parent in this type of situation. Most of me is like “It serves the little shit right for being a piss pot!!” But as a parent, I need to send the right message to Bud that this sort of behavior is unacceptable.
• I have been shopping for children’s clothes on Ebay lately and for Lucy, it has worked out so well! For a total of $40 (2 different auctions—including shipping) I got her 10 full outfits, a few sweatshirts and 4 pair of jeans. Stuff that looks brand new. I am pleased. And also ready to start selling some of my own stuff on there. I think I can make a killing! We’ll see, I suppose.

Have You Seen This??

I want to go back in time and BE THERE!!!

This Magic Moment

She hears the dog across the street barking long before we are actually ready to get up. She barks back a few times before standing up in the crib and screaming "Ma!! Ma!!! aaaaaaaaare youuuuuu?? MA!!! MA?? MA!!!" I haven't even rolled out of bed yet and the cat walks by. She meows at him relentlessly, as if asking him questions in cat speak. "Mow?? Mow mow?? MOW kitty cat, mow?"

She sees me sneak by to get her bottle ready. She knows where I am going but insists on screaming "Out? Out??" and when I arrive with her bottle like clockwork she picks up her blanket and hands it to me. "See?" she says as if I should be surprised that the blanket was in her crib. As I lay her back down with the bottle, her hand shoots up to ask for her blanket back.

I usually take my shower while she is taking her bottle, and by the time I've gotten out, she's got the big kids up and has somehow convinced them to entertain her. She is standing in her crib clapping and laughing at their antics.

I get her out, and get her changed and dressed for the day. As soon as she's dressed, she asks for her shoes. She carries them and her socks to grandpa's room shouting "shoes! on!" the whole way there. She loves her routine and is a creature of habit.

This is my absolute favorite part of having kids. That magical time when your child turns from baby to toddler, expanding their comprehension and vocabulary seemingly by the minute. A year ago, she laid around like a lump. Now--she moves from morning until night. Sure, there are rough spots, like the fact that she doesn't sleep through the night or the fact that she routinely throws a temper tantrum during dinner, but she is such a bright spot in our lives right now.

When I am leaving her in the morning, she runs to me with her lips turned up for a kiss goodbye. She does the same to her daddy, brother and sister at bedtime. When it's time to read, she is climbing in to the bed, just as excited as the big kids. "See book?", she asks and then settles in to a lap to listen to the story.

Remember way back when I was pregnant and was worried about how she would change our family dynamic? It was a real concern then and to even think of it now, it seems like it was an irrational worry. Of course she fits right in with us. She is one of us. Hub said it best a few weeks ago when we were talking about how lucky we truly are. "She is the icing on the cake."

But if I WERE to have more kids...

My boss and his wife had their first child last week. They just named her this past weekend. This is UNFATHOMABLE to me. Could you even imagine? I have so many names lying in wait for children that I will never have (though we've spoken more recently about MAYBE having a 4th) you would not even believe it. I can't imagine showing up at the hospital without having at least a pretty good idea of what my child would be called. In all three of my own pregnancies, the baby was named pretty much as soon as we knew the sex. (Aside from Liv's middle name which was changed at the last minute when Hub called his mom to tell her she was here.)

This seems like as good a reason as any to discuss some actual names, doesn't it? I think that if I were to define my own naming style, it would be classic, with a bit of modern flair. Bud's real name hasn't made it in to the top 100 list in about a zillion years, but it is a recognizable, normal name. And my girl's names are much more common, each of them slightly modern; slightly classic.

Prior to having children, I was obsessed with the name Sebastian for a boy (What is he, a CAT?) Hub was hell to the no on that one. We did actually end up naming our cat Sebastian. And for a girl, aside from the name we chose for our first daughter, I loved (still love) Felicity. Felicity was a great show, and a great name too. Hub vetoed for no "nicknameablity" and I'll give him that, but really...so pretty.

If I were to have another child the (very few) top boy contenders would be: Callum, Andrew, or Erik. Something tells me that Hub would loathe Callum. But I love it. And also, Cal.

For a girl, I really like(in this order) Fiona, Carly, Abby (not Abigail), Delilah, and Lilly.

I may never have the opportunity to use any of these names. The point is that if I do, here is our starting point. I have a list. The baby will surely be named before he or she is born. I could not deal with having to make such a decision in the delivery room.

What about you? I'm dying to know what you would name your future child--or what the contenders might be.

**for the record, my boss named his daughter Ava

Friday Free For All-FALL! AUTUMN! WAHOO!

* This is my favorite FAVORITE time of year. For real. Everything. The air, the events, the frame of mind; the anticipation of what's to come. Yes, I love the fall. LOVE IT! Passionately.
* I do get mildly depressed though to realize that we will not be spending any portion of Autumn in the foreseeable future in the White Mountains of NH. Damn school aged children. Hub did promise me that we could go next year, however, it will be a late summer trip. New Hampshire in the fall is my heaven.
* Be proud of me--I've only had 3 Pumpkin Spice Lattes so far.
* I can not wait to make Mommy Daisy's pumpkin chocolate chip cookies, which have been an autumn staple the last 2 years. (link to be added later)
* And No Whey Mama's Autumn Soup (again, link later)
* I think I am most looking forward to apple picking. This was a new activity for us last year and ended up being our favorite. Plus, the orchard we went to had homemade pumpkin ice cream!!!
* And of course our annual photo at Letchworth State Park--at least there's no chance of the big kids dropping Liv on her head this year. (jinx)
* Ok but (really) most of all, I'm looking forward to the kids enjoying it all. Liv will be able to take most of it in and be an active participant. I love that the kids know that we have traditions and that they are looking forward to doing all this crap as much as we are.
* YAY FALL!

Growing a Pair

Yesterday I did something that I normally wouldn't do. The background is basicall that I applied for a new job last week-within my current company-a new position that would suit me so well I couldn't even believe it- and awaited a phone call. I arrived Monday morning to find 2 emails from our recruiter. The first was the generic "I am reviewing all applicants" email, and the second was a canned response that basically stated she was pursuing candidates with a skill set that better matched the position.

I was annoyed, and then pissed. My skill set IS this position. Yes, I have done a different job for the last 10 years, however, my resume and college experience speak to being qualified. How am I not a match?

I would normally just let this sit. I feel so strongly about this job though, that I sent an email to the recruiter. I asked her whether she could explain how my skill set didn't match, and whether she would have some time to discuss it with me. I asked to be put through to the interview process and to let the line of business decide whether or not I was a strong candidate.

She and I played phone tag all day yesterday, and I have an appointment to speak to her on my lunch hour.

BOOYA! (really??)

Regardless of the outcome, I am proud to have stood up for myself. I am at a point in my life where it is time to take control of my career. If it doesn't work out with this particular position, I want it to be known that I am motivated to move. To take the next step.

Well, that's kind of exhilarating now, isn't it?

The Grind

We had such an amazing long weekend that I needed a day to recoup just to write about it. (ok, not really, heh.)

When I picked the girls up from my mother’s on Friday Lucy mentioned that she had seen on the news that there was a chicken wing festival in town, and boy does she love chicken wings! Hub and I had been to Wing Fest before, and didn’t necessarily plan on going, but how can you resist this face?




Lucy and I went on our own Saturday afternoon and spent a couple of hours sampling chicken wings. I don’t remember where they were from, but this was a sea salt and vinegar wing, which we decided was our very favorite.




While we were there, plans were in the works for Hub and I to spend the evening out. My parents took the big kids overnight (for the very first time--OMG) and Liv stayed home with FIL because I wasn’t ready to hand her over to someone overnight. Hub and I saw a late showing of ‘Inglourious Basterds’, which was an amazing movie ( a testament to how good it was is the fact that at least 75% of the movie was subtitled, and Hub didn’t even mind) and then had an appetizer at The Cheesecake Factory. We took some cheesecake home because it was after midnight by then, and had dessert and coffee in front of the TV.

Sunday morning Hub and I relaxed a bit, basking in the glory of having only one child, and then we worked around the house and yard for a bit. My parents brought the big kids home in the afternoon and stayed for the evening while we barbequed and played with the kids in the yard. It was a nice relaxing evening.

We got up on Monday itching to do something, but really had no plans or ideas. We thought about checking out a park in Erie, PA that has been suggested to us several times, but came upon the Erie Zoo instead. The kids slept on the way down, about 1.5 hours, and we had a really good time. It was Liv’s first time at the zoo, and although she thought all of the animals were “woof woofs” she really enjoyed herself. Especially in the petting zoo with Hub. We stopped for dinner on the way back and were home fairly early; Bud had school in the morning.






(on our way home)



I feel like this weekend was the precursor of fun autumn weekends to come; this is by far my favorite time of year. Soon, we’ll be apple picking and taking our yearly trip to Letchworth, and then heading off to the pumpkin patch. And let’s not forget Pumpkin Spice Lattes, now.

Hooray for fall. And Hooray for spending time with my wonderful and beautiful family.

And So,

“Hey everybody, I'm on no sleep, no sleep!. You don't know what it's like in there; all night long things are creeping and cracking. And that red light is burning my brain!”

The baby was up like, 25 times last night and I am exhausted. It wasn’t her usual “I’m up for a little snuggle” deal, but rather, “I’m up!! Let’s play!! Is that the kitty???” She didn’t want to lay in her bed, or even lay on me, which usually works. She was UP. And screaming “OUT! OUT! OUT!” and when I got her out, she wanted to wake daddy and Grandpa. She just goes and goes all day long, and when it carries over in to the evening…we’re all screwed.

Yesterday ended up being not too horrible, although Bud already came home with a note that someone in his class was sent home with head lice. Apparently, one of the first things they did was take a walk down to the nurse for a healthy hair check. I’m just hoping that it was early enough where we don’t really need to worry about Bud’s exposure. He enjoyed school, he told me, although, he was miffed that he ‘didn’t learn anything’.

The last Buffalo preseason game was last night, and Hub got free tickets, so he and Bud went after Tae Kwon Do. I got home later that I would have liked because of stadium traffic, but once there I packed up the girls and headed to the farmer’s market. It is pretty close to our house and I see it all the time, but never remember exactly where it is. In any case, I had been meaning to go, and the girls were up for a trip, so we went. And it was cute. Small, but cute. We picked up some grapes and fresh baked goods, and Lucy picked out some smoked sausage for dinner. By the time we got home and I cooked it up, it was nearly bedtime. The boys were on their way home, so we waited up to see them. Everyone was in bed a bit later than I would have liked, but in all, I think we all had a pretty good day. (you know, prior to the baby being up al night)

I am really looking forward to the long weekend. Aside from playing some baseball in the yard, we have no plans for the first weekend in a very long time. Personally, I am hoping to get out from under some of the clutter in the house that has been compounded by having all of Hub’s mom’s stuff there, in addition to some strategic relocation of some items from when our sewer backed up in to the basement earlier in the week. (yeah.) I also need to set a plan for picking up some fall clothing for Bud and Lucy, who have close to nothing for the upcoming season. (yes, Lucy got all new summer clothes for her birthday in August. SRSLY. But I am not mad; I look at them as an investment for Liv.) Anyway, I’m thinking of checking out consignment. Does anyone have any experience with that?

I want credit for not sobbing and collapsing in to a heap of mess…

Today I put my firstborn on the bus for the first time; it is his first day of Kindergarten. Those of you who have done it probably know that it is a bittersweet event. On one hand, here is my baby, MY BABY, on a bus and then in the hands of strangers for the better part of 8 hours. He may have to make INDEPENDENT DECISIONS! And OMG! My BABY!! But really, on the other (slightly more rational [ish]) hand, I know that he is ready. My husband and I have prepared him for this day in the best ways that we could. He is a smart, well rounded child. The real question should be ‘is kindergarten ready for him?’.



The bus left and we waited a few minutes before heading over to the school. Hub pulled in to the parking lot and we took a spin around. Bud was already off the bus, standing on the steps of the school. As we left the parking lot, he saw us and waved. It was no big deal.




I, er, may or may not have driven by the school again on my way to work.

So now we wait for him to come home and hear how his very first school day went. I wonder if anyone will ask me how MY first day of having a school aged child went.

I want my baby back.

Crack is Whack!

I love technology. LOVE it. I am definitely not the most tech savvy person on the planet, but I do enjoy my toys—Sirius Satellite Radio, TiVo, the whole shebang.

For the last 2 years, I have used my LG Fusic with no issues. It fulfilled my need for an MP3 player and I have been able to use it to access the internet in a limited capacity. It was very handy when I was nursing Liv and still serves me well when I am up in the middle of the night with her; it gives me something to do to keep my eyes open.

Recently though, especially after my job put the kibosh on using such sites as Facebook and Twitter, I’ve been looking for more. There are so many things I’d been used to doing on my lunch break, that were no longer possible. As of today, I am eligible to upgrade my Fusic, and I am heading right down to the Sprint store to pick up a Blackberry.



I know! A crackberry! I am, like, foaming at the mouth over it. It has TV! And GPS! And Radio! And so much other stuff! And I never have to deal with T9 again! I am just so excited. It probably won’t be perfect, I know. But I think we’ll get along just fine.

What about you? Is there any piece of technology you can’t live without? Anything you want to tell me about Blackberry?

Things

• Bud’s surgery went amazingly well yesterday. Better than I could have imagined. For one, they only had to take out the extra tooth, when they planned on taking his 2 front teeth along with it. For another, they just yanked it out. Like, with pliers. I couldn’t watch. So, he is on a diet of soft foods until Saturday while he heels, but he is really no worse for the wear. I took before and after shots, but there are at home. Here is a picture of the actual tooth, which I guess was the rarest kind they usually see. The pointed part is the root. Creepy, right? I’m just glad it’s out of there.


• In other dental news, Bud has his first loose tooth, AND we can see his 2 bottom permanent teeth on the way. I can’t believe it!
• We have a kindergarten orientation picnic on Friday and Bud officially goes to school next Thursday. The bus stopped by the other day mapping out it’s route. I can’t say for certain that we will let him take the bus on the very first day. How will he know where to go? This is very stressful from a parent’s perspective. I feel like I am sending my boy out on his own or something. At least when Lucy goes next year, she’ll have Bud to show her the way.
• Speaking of Lucy, she turned 4 last week and I’m sorry to say that there was no change in her behavior as she changed from 3 to 4. She is, perhaps, more dramatic. We bought her Hello Kitty rain boots that she refuses, I mean REFUSES to take off. I would not allow her to wear them to the county fair last Thursday because it was 95 humid degrees outside and she pouted most of the day. We were caught in a rain storm on our way out of the fairgrounds. After finally making it to the truck, she cried indignantly “See Mom! I told you I should have worn my RAIN BOOTS!” Yes, I suppose she should have.


• We went to the library Saturday, where Bud got his library card and we took out our first chapter book, which we’ve been reading at bed time. Liv had a great time too.

• We went on a picnic Saturday, just on a whim, and I threw the kids’ water shoes in the car because there is a rocky brook at the park, where Hub and I used to wander when we camped. After lunch, all 3 of the kids took to the water. Imagine my surprise when Liv was the most enthusiastic of all of them. She was genuinely pissed when I made her hold my hand as she navigated the rocks and water. She is a dare devil, that is for sure.
• Finally, I will leave you with some photos from the girls’ big birthday bash. We had a great day, and the only glitch was trying to facilitate the opening of gifts between both girls. Next year, I will definitely ask for a second set of hands. (contrary to popular belief, Bud was at the party. He was just off with his cousins all day, and not in any photos)

Happy (belated) Birthday, Baby!

In all the chaos of the last few weeks, I neglected to mention that my Liv, celebrated her 1st birthday on July 29th. A year! Can you even believe it? The time has gone so fast, and yet, it seems like she’s been with us forever. Indeed, she was a good addition to our family.



She is a little spitfire too. She, who was smaller than my other children at birth, is now a 23lb tyrant. She is a big girl, and she thinks she is even bigger, since she follows her older siblings around everywhere. She runs, not walks, everywhere, and is insistent to climb everything, including our gate. She adores her big brother, and well, she tolerates her big sister. She makes her opinions known whether you are listening or not; there is no question as to what she wants at any given time.




And the talking, my God, the talking. When she was about 6 months old, she started saying kitty cat (teee tat!!) over and over again. We thought that it might be the only word she ever spoke. Slowly, more words came. Eddie, Daddy, Caitlyn. Mama……but only when she is very upset. Now she speaks too many words to count. She loves to say “Hi!” and will usually say “Hi kitty!” or “Hi Daddy!” The latest is “kitty cat moooooow” (kitty cat meow) and boy does she love to say “uh oh!!”. My favorite though, might be “night night”….or maybe “cheese” (seeeeessse) when she sees the camera.




The look on her face last week, when we all sang happy birthday, was priceless. She loves singing regardless, but when she realized we were all singing, only to her, it was pretty great.

And for all she’s accomplished, she has not learned to sleep. Nope. There is too much going on! Too much to do! She wakes up shrieking in the middle of the night, only to settle right back down as soon as she can burrow in to my shoulder. This is bad; I know. I should leave her alone. But she is my baby girl. Maybe my last.

On Saturday, she’ll have her very first birthday party, shared with her big sister, who’ll be 4 next week. She’ll be the life of the party, I’m sure. She always is.

Happy Birthday, baby. Mommy loves you to the moon!

On Grief

We sat drinking coffee on the porch last night, on the outdoor wicker furniture that used to be in my mother-in-law’s living room. It wasn’t that she didn’t want or couldn’t afford regular furniture. She just really had a thing for wicker.

She’s been gone for 11 days.

In the past, grief has been 100% personal for me. How was it affecting ME. What was I going to do from here. This time though, it’s different.

Yes, I’ve lost my mother-in-law, really, my second mother for the last 15 years, and it is incredibly hard. She drove me absolutely crazy. But everything I have ever said about her here or elsewhere, I could—and did-- say to her face. We laughed about her putting ketchup on everything I cooked. We laughed about her needing coffee so bad that she had me get up and make a pot THE DAY I brought Liv home from the hospital. She was easy like that. I miss her so so much. And it’s so not even real, though I saw her with my own eyes dead in the hospital, and then again in her casket last Friday. It was much too soon; I had spoken to her (as best as she could—but she was awake and alert) just a few hours before. How could she possibly be gone?

I don’t feel like it is fair for me to be this upset though. At least not openly. My husband has lost his mother, for crying out loud. I can’t think of anything that could possibly hurt more. His mother. Gone. Forever. And he’s doing ok, really. It’s hard on him; he spent a ridiculous amount of time with her. He was working on getting her an apartment close to us. If he didn’t see her, he spoke to her at least once a day on the phone. I don’t know how, but he is getting through.

And the kids? Well, they’re ok. When we told Lucy last Sunday, she cried like she never has before. A cry that would break a stranger’s heart. And again, at the funeral home, when she saw her—heartbreaking sobs, and all that I could do was hold her and sob right along with her. Bud is handling it differently—very bluntly as a matter of fact—telling everyone that his grandma has DIED. From SMOKING. And we will NEVER! SEE! HER! AGAIN!

It’s crazy like you would not even believe. I’m sad for me, losing my MIL and friend, for Hub who has lost his mother, and for the kids who have lost their grandma. I think that it’s harder for me because I am shouldering their grief as well. Gah. I don’t even want to talk about it anymore.

And so, I am here, but not really here. Dealing with things in my way. And hoping that somehow, we all come out of it.

Friday Free For All- Here in my car

• I didn’t get my driver’s license until I was 18. Not because I didn’t want it, but because I wasn’t allowed to. My parents used the excuse that it was because the car my dad was driving at the time was in my Gram’s name.
• To this day, I believe it was because my mother doesn’t drive, and even if she never said it, did not want me to drive either.
• I got my permit when I was 17 and my mother-in-law taught me how to drive.
• Somehow though, I took my road test in my father’s car. I passed, even though I backed in to a snow bank.
• I went for a drive to visit Hub at his job just after I passed my road test. When I got home, I undershot the turn in to my parent’s driveway, and ended up wedging my dad’s car on top of a huge landscaping rock on the front lawn. Yeah.
• I have a lot of misdirected resentment because my middle brother was given a car when he got his license.
• Up until this past December, I had never owned a used car. Coincidentally, the truck I drive now is probably my favorite vehicle EVER.
• I have only leased/owned Ford vehicles: 3 Ford Rangers, a Ford Escape, a Ford Freestar minivan (Hub’s car) and an F150 (my car)
• I was a horrible driver and did not care about it until I got pregnant the 1st time.
• In those 6 or so years of driving, I was in a lot of accidents, nearly totaling 2 of my trucks. My last Ranger spent so much time in the shop that we were able to drive it to New Hampshire and back on our honeymoon without even putting it close to going over on mileage.
• When Hub and I go places together, he usually drives.
• Not because I hate driving (which I do) but because he gets car sick really easily.
• I love rocking out while I’m driving.
• My kids do not love it as much.
• I always text while I am driving.
• I talk on the phone without a headset too; I like to live on the edge.
• True Story: once I was driving and talking on the phone to Hub. I drove right past a cop, and saw that he saw me. I started to put the phone down, but didn’t want to worry Hub so I told him why I was hanging up, and then put the phone down. The officer asked me why I had continued to talk, even after I saw him. I told him that I knew he’d seen me, so I figured I would finish what I had to say. He let me go with a warning because he appreciated my honesty.

Happy Thoughts

Well, here are a few happy things in spite of all the crapola going on lately—

• Hub was at Radio Shack last week looking for a new head set and came upon a TiVo marked down to $19.99. We’ve been wanting a new one because ours only records 1 thing at a time and you have to watch what is recording. Rather than buying a new $200 TiVo we were going to reluctantly succumb to DVR. Then this fell in his lap. YAY!
• He also came home yesterday with Seinfeld Scene It which we have been wanting for a while now. I hope we can play it this weekend.
• The baby is transitioning well to whole milk. We are at 2oz in every bottle right now with no issues. Moving to 3 tonight. We’ll need to buy a small can of formula, but that should be it FOREVER.
• I snipped some chives and oregano from my garden yesterday and made an impromptu tomato sauce and served it over whole wheat pasta. Man, I felt accomplished. And then when I posted about it on Facebook, someone said I was superwoman for managing 3 children a full time job AND a garden. Hardly true, but it made me feel pretty good.

Sickness

So. My mother-in law. She has the lung cancer. Yeah. Also some mysterious disease that is causing her to lose platelets. And some form of dementia. She has been in ICU since Friday, when she passed out while filing for aid at Social Services.

Things are not good.

When I met Hub, way back when I was 15, she was the coolest mom I knew. She cared not what he did, so long as he came home at night. She, unlike my own mother, was supportive and appreciative when she found out that I was on the pill. She taught me to drive.

Things have gone down hill for her over the years as her father and sister passed away. She has been a colossal pain in the ass.

She puts ketchup on everything I cook.

But I don’t wish her dead. Or sick. Or any of this.

I’d really like for her to be well.

If you are the praying type, could you say one for her? Her grandkids would like to see her again.

My three

I don’t usually read Whimsy, but her whole Blog Drought Thing has me intrigued.

Today, (well yesterday) the idea was to pick 3 of your posts for people to read. Without further ado, here are 3 of my favorites.

There was my tirade when SOMEONE STOLE OUR BABY’S NAME!! last March. Fun Fact—this has had little to no impact on my life. Pregnancy hormones are FUN!!

Here is one of a few “Open Letter” posts I wrote. I particularly like this one because it is a reminder of Lucy being completely inappropriate with Chapstick.

And here is one from my old blog which seems so long ago, when Bud was 2.5 and Lucy was 1.

Pointless

I’ve been having a good time reading my blog posts from last July. Fun times!! I can’t believe I looked like that!

Liv will be a year old 2 weeks from today? Where does the time go? I’m not going to speculate, but surely there must be some conspiracy. She still SLEEPS like a newborn, so she most definitely can’t be 1.

She took her 1st steps Saturday night, in front of Hub’s mom, brother and sister. She wanted BIL’s container of wipes. She has consistently taken between 2 and 6 steps when prompted since then—FOR US. Not at daycare or for my mother. She wants everyone to think we are liars, apparently.

This whole week feels like a time suck because I am working Saturday. Normally, Wednesday is like, WOOO! Halfway there!!! Not so much today though. I am off Monday though, and then have 3 days off the following week. And then some time in August……And then Summer will be over.

This post is going nowhere and I am off to a retirement lunch. (not mine, sadly)

Friday (un) Free-For-All

This whole week has been a free-for-all. And when the hell was the last time I posted 3 times in a week? WOW!

Last night turned out to be a great night, despite my misgivings on my SIL arriving so early. I really love my SIL. If I had a sister myself, I would want it to be her. She is a hippie, essentially, patchouli and all. She doesn’t care what other people think; she is free and loose and generally awesome. I wish she lived here instead of Florida.

Anyhoo, she got to our place around 6:30 and we all went to Friendly’s for dinner. The kids stayed up late showing off for somebody new, and then she, Hub and I stayed up talking until after midnight. I’m looking forward to more of the same this weekend.

In other news, we think we have found a place for MIL to live; less than 5 minutes down the road from us. This will mean a lot in that we’ll be able to check in on her on our way home, grocery shop for/with her and so on. I’m hoping that the security deposit is reasonable and that we can get her in there soon.

Does anyone have any experience with selling on Ebay? I want to start selling off our baby clothes etc and I wonder if Ebay is the way to go. Craig’s List freaks me out, the whole meeting up in a dark alley to exchange goods for cash aspect of it, but, is Ebay out? Do people go there anymore? I wonder.

Want to know something else I hate? When people brush their teeth in a public bathroom. I mean, sure I REALLY admire your hygiene, but I’m not interested in seeing you spit all over the sink. And also, the minty minty toothpaste smell, mixed with bathroom smells, totally makes me nauseous.

There, I feel better. Happy Weekend!

Pet(ty) Peeve(ish) Things

Because I’m still in a bad mood (MOSTLY because my SIL is getting in to town 5 hours sooner than scheduled):

• When I say “Hi, how are ya” to somebody and they only say “hi” back without asking how I am in return. I realize that neither of us cares how the other one is doing, but it’s rude not to ask.
• When people soap up their hands in the bathroom before they’ve gotten them wet. It totally just skeeves me out.
• The fact that someone invited me to order lunch with her today, but she is not going to get it until 1:15. For the love of GOD, that is practically dinner time.
• That no matter how often I sweep or vacuum, my entire floor is always covered in crumbs.
• When people say “If you have any questions, please see Sara or Myself.” Can I see yourself soon? GAH!
• I hate it when people try to tell me things about my kids. Not like “Bud did X at summer camp today……” but like when people act like they know MORE about them than I do. “Oh that Liv, she sure has a temper on her…Lucy loves to eat olives…” As if they are educating me or something. When all of my kids were babies, they were grunters and people constantly told me, “oooh, he/she is making a big mess in the diaper!!” and I’d be all like, “no, the grunting is just what they do…” and people would ARGUE with me. This is One of Those Things I Think About. Like all the time.
• When people spell out “OK.” OKAY!! This is perfectly acceptable…BUT NOT TO ME!!!
• People sending read receipts on their email. I always refuse to send the receipt. SCREW YOU and your attempt to create a paper trail!!

Ok(ay)! I am eating my arm because my lunch still isn’t here!!

In which I bitch and moan

Every day for the last 10 or so days has been “one of those days”. Hub is crazy, the kids are crazy. And I feel crazy.

It started a week ago Saturday, when Hub worked all morning/afternoon and I ran around alone with all three kids doing banking, shopping, and then a ridiculous and tiresome lunch in the park. I had no sooner got home, got all 3 kids sleeping and had just fallen asleep myself when Hub got the call that his mother was in heart failure and being rushed to the hospital. She is DNR, so OMG. Hub is the healthcare proxy as well, so he needed to be there, BUT he also needed to be home to take the big kids to see Walking with Dinosaurs by 6PM. It was a freaking roller coaster.

All of last week went along like that, Hub splitting his time between work and the hospital. I was alone with the kids every single night last week, working dinner, bed time, baths, prepping for the next day, everything. And while my children are (mostly) well behaved angels during the day, they turn in to hell beasts at night. I don’t know why they have such a hard time settling down in the evening, but they do. And usually Hub is there for at least part of the time to help corral them. By the time Wednesday came along though, I was contemplating driving off a cliff, or possibly locking them all in a closet while I went off on a drinking binge. Yes, it was that bad.

MIL is better though, had a nasty case of pneumonia that was exacerbated by a. smoking, b. living in a second floor apartment with no AC, and c. generally not taking care of herself. She’s been depressed for a long time now, and it has kind of come to a head. She is out of the hospital and staying with her mother. We are looking to get her in to assisted living; Hub is getting power of attorney and will be her legal guardian.

I feel like this shit shouldn’t be happening to us for another 20 years. We shouldn’t have to take care of his 55-year-old mother.

To top it off, my SIL is coming to town TOMORROW because she feels like she needs to see her mom. She hasn’t been home for over 3 years. Guess where she is sleeping? That would be my couch. I warned her that there are children up at all hours of the night. She doesn’t seem to mind. Ok then.

So, the ride has not yet ended and doesn’t appear to be stopping soon. Calgon! Take me away!

Maybe...

The baby is finally sleeping regularly through the night AND in her own bed. Which in a word is amazing. I feel like I have a whole new lease on life, now that I have moved from the couch in to my own bed, and I am not being torn from sleep with frantic screaming several times a night. I have woken several times in a panic like “OMG, what’s going on?? Why isn’t she up??” but that too, has passed. I even told Hub that he could put the swing away, which has been our godsend over the last 11 months. (Despite the fact that she is WAAAAAAY to large for it)

What worked was
• Lowering her crib mattress to the lowest level
• Placing her in the crib and allowing her to cry herself to sleep
• Allowing her to sleep on her belly

The first few nights were a hell that I have never experienced since Bud and Lucy always slept well. Now though, after maybe 2 weeks, she will fuss a bit and then go right back down. And if she does stir in the night, she puts herself back to sleep. She has gone from sleeping maybe 6-7 hours a night to sleeping for a solid 11 hours, to the point of me having to wake her up to get ready for the day. And it’s so cute!! She buries her head back in to her mattress and peeks up at me as if to say “Really?? Already??” And then she lies there with her bottle, and when it is empty, she yells “DONE!” and we are ready for our day.

Perspective is a funny thing. If you asked me a few months, or even a few weeks ago if I could ever do this again, the whole baby thing, the answer would have been a solid “HELLZ NAH!!” While watching “Deliver Me” last night, I cried for the first time since Liv was born, upon seeing the birth of another baby.

And for the first time in a very long time, I thought “Who knows; maybe…”

Friday Free For All- Things that are bugging me...

1. Ok, I’m just going to say it and maybe I’ll catch some heat for it—DMB. I don’t get the obsession with him or his band. Sure, the music is ok though I do find every song to be ridiculously long. But srsly—I don’t get it.
2. Adding to the list of things I have found in the baby’s mouth recently: a cat’s discarded toe nail. I can not stop gagging when I’m thinking about it.
3. Despite having a day off next week, I have to work tomorrow, training some new hires. It’s supposed to be a beautiful day, and we have plans (CRASH-A-RAMA Demolition Derby!!) in the evening, so it’s going to be a long day for me.
4. My skin. I mentioned during my pregnancy how bad it was, and it has not gotten any better. I guess I’m going to have to see a dermatologist because I’ve tried every lotion, potion and supposed miracle to no avail. I look worse than I did as a teenager. It’s really frustrating. Ugh, my hair too. It’s a stringy, disgusting mess.
5. Speaking of frustrating—my job in general. LE Sigh. I’ve decided that I want to work in the city, so I’m watching for opportunity there.
6. Also, because it is webmail, GMAIL has been blocked here citing a security risk, so I can only check my mail via phone. But I can still get in to Facebook and Twitter.
7. My mother in law is moving to Alaska for 3 months….oh, wait….that is NOT bothering me one bit.

Sunshine and Roses

If you follow me on Facebook or Twitter, you are likely aware that the baby has begun crawling and pulling her self up, and straight up standing within the last week or so. It has opened up an entire new world to her, for obvious reasons, but has also opened the dialogue between Hub and me as to whether she truly will be our final baby. (short answer—yes)

When you think of babies, you think of the snuggly little newborn who is on a sleep/eat/poop continuum. Teeny babies in footie pajamas, content to sleep on your shoulder or in the crook of your arm, content to be left in one spot for any period of time. You don’t think about the baby who refuses to sleep in her own bed, or finds rocks and rubber bands and pieces of random crap to shove in her mouth regardless of how vigilant you are about vacuuming and keeping your floors clean. You don’t think about baby proofing, or strategically closing off a part of your living room, or making sure the toilet is closed. You don’t remember worrying about whether she will stand up in her crib (should she choose to sleep there) and figure out a way to catapult herself out, because that is just the kind of baby she is.

We are in hell with Liv right now, a kind of hell that we never experienced with Bud and Lucy. She’s in to EVERYTHING and is constantly getting her fingers stuck in things and going after the cats and she wants what she wants when she wants it and you better comply or deal with her wrath. When you tell her no, she laughs and shakes her head no right back at you…and then blows you a kiss and moves on her merry way. She doesn’t know she is a tyrant; she thinks she is funny. And really, she is a perfectly happy baby. She is loud and exuberant a 22lb jolly sweetheart—unless you try and get in her way.

I know this is normal, I do. But I wasn’t prepared!! You don’t think about this stuff when you decide to have a baby! You think –it will be all snuggly fun!! It is not all snuggly fun.

Remind me of this when I get all swoony for one last baby, ok? Remind me that it is hard. And that eventually they’ll turn in to weirdo 5-year-olds, which is a whole new ball game.

In all, good.

 

I had a good weekend, beginning Friday night.  Well, sort of.  My cousin’s wedding shower was Friday night, and it was a cocktail party, which I thought was different and fun.  I had to drive my mother out there, so I went to her house from work and got ready.  Without getting in to every.single.detail, on the way there the conversation turned to why my cousin might not have asked me to be in the wedding, and my mother basically implied that it was because I was fat and would ruin her picture perfect event.  Not in so many words, but that was totally the point.  I suppose though, who better to make you feel ashamed than your mom?  I don’t know.  The shower itself was fun though and I had a good time chatting with my aunts and SIL.  Better yet, my Aunt drove my mom home, and I didn’t have to.

 

Saturday morning, I took Bud to Tae Kwon Do, and then did some cleaning while Hub cleaned out his machine in the driveway.  In case you were wondering, carpet cleaning machine sludge and gunk kills worms.  There are a quintillion of them lying dead in my driveway.  His employee brought his 5-year-old daughter over while they worked and she and the big kids played really well together.  After lunch I took Lucy and Liv to the outlet mall.  Liv didn’t need any clothes, but Lucy and Bud had nothing for the summer.  I typically do their shopping solo, but Lucy is so awkward with sizes, she needed to try things on.  Does anyone else have that issue with their girls?  I mean, Bud is 5 and he wears a 5.  He will be in a 6 this winter when he turns 6—no questions asked.  Lucy, who is still 3 by the way, is a 4T in some things, a 4 in others and a 5T in other things.  It’s re-fricking-diculous,  So she tried things on and tried to throw headbands, barrettes and shoes in to the stroller without me noticing, and Liv pulled things down off of shelves and racks everywhere we stopped.  Oh yes, fun times.  Generally though, they were well behaved and fun to be with.  They even came along happily with me to Old Navy when my flip flop snapped and broke in the middle of our trip.  They are good girls; and deserved the ice cream we shared.  And, oh, I scored great deals!!  And the Crabby Tee!!  Squee!!

 

Yesterday, Hub went to the bakery in the morning to get my favorite donuts, and then took the kids out for the day.  I read the paper and sipped coffee and then took a scalding hot shower in peace.  After that, I napped for 3 hours.  It was a glorious day.  They came home toting gifts, a new cook book from Bud, and a picture frame with 3 slots for 3 kids from Lucy.  Then we had breakfast for dinner.  I bathed the kids while Hub got ready for work, and the big kids went to bed early.  I snuggled with the baby on the couch watching TV while she slept on my shoulder.  She smelled so clean and was just a warm snuggly yummikins.  It may have been the best day eve.  The end.

Too all my Crabby friends

The Crabby Tee is available again at TCP. A little bit different than the one we all bought a few years ago (when lucy was….sigh…..not even 2), but a crabby tee just the same!

In other toothy news.....

Somebody is 9 months old today!!

..so I can wish you Merry Christmas...

Since my first child started to walk, my fear of damaged teeth set in. I don’t know what it was, but every time he walked (who am I kidding, he ran everywhere) I cringed a little. I knew he was just going to fall flat on his face and knock a tooth out. I knew that nothing would be done because they were baby teeth. I worried that I’d have a 2 or 3 year old walking around, missing a front tooth, until he was 6 or 7. To say that protecting his teeth (and Lucy's and now Liv's too) was an obsession, would be a huge understatement.

We were lucky though. Bud has managed to chip both of his bottom front teeth over his 5.5 years, once by falling off of a swing at age 2, and again last summer by banging his chin on the floor at school. This was generally, not a big deal and if noting else, assured me that the kid’s teeth were pretty tough.

I wasn’t really waiting for the other shoe to drop, but it has, in a big way.

I mentioned last week discovering the growth of an extra tooth in Bud’s mouth. It has been coming down right in between his 2 front teeth, pushing them farther and farther apart. Yesterday was the fateful dentist appointment, and he did surprisingly well, chatting with Dr. Mary, sitting well for an x-ray, everything. I was proud of our kid.

The Dr. was too. He has very clean teeth and no cavities, so yay! She reviewed the x-ray to determine if this was, in fact, an extra tooth, or if one of his permanent teeth was coming down early, and in the wrong spot. The x-ray revealed that it was for sure an extra tooth and the dentist let us know that it has done no damage to his permanent teeth. Hub and I were relieved…until…the other shoe dropped.

It is dissolving Bud’s baby teeth. Right now it’s not such a big deal, but if the deteriorate further, it could cause decay and problems for his permanent teeth. So. Not only will he be having the extra tooth removed, he needs to have the 2 front teeth removed as well. It is the best option to protect the big teeth.

And I get it, I do. But I hate the thought of my baby being without his front teeth for a year or more. He’ll go off to kindergarten like this. Who knows when the big teeth will come down.

It’s trivial, I know. And in the grand scheme of things, it doesn’t really mater. It matters to me though. It’s like a nightmare is coming true and I can see it coming a mile away. And I can’t do anything to stop it.

The procedure will occur in late August, giving the extra tooth some more time to descend so that she can just yank it, as opposed to cutting his gums. I guess we'll just enjoy his (extra) toothy grin until then.

(insert title here)

To say that the last couple of weeks have been hellish would be the understatement of the century. It started 2 weeks ago Monday, when I had the day off. The kids went to preschool/daycare and Hub and I spent the day together. I picked the baby up early to take her to get her picture taken, since we have not taken her even once since her birth. (the curse of the 3r chilled, I know) She was amazing at the photo session, and they took a zillion photos because she was just so good. We left, and she slept in the car seat for a good 2 hours. She woke up feverish and miserable, refused to eat and did not sleep a wink. It was more of the same on Tuesday—just one crabby baby. I took her to the doctor the next day to discover a double ear infection and the start of something in her throat. So there were antibiotics and Motrin for days on end.

Just when she started feeling better, the teething began to kick in to high gear. She finally popped the 1st bottom tooth last week, and the second one appeared yesterday. Her moods have been hit and miss and it is either WAY up or WAY down, never in between. And through it all, she’s decided that she no longer likes to sleep. I can usually get her to go down in her bed and she’ll stay for a few hours but then she’s up, and wants to sleep on me, or in the swing, or a combination of the 2. I’m probably fostering this behavior because my main concern is that she doesn’t wake the big kids. I’m at a loss; I’ve never had a baby who doesn’t sleep.

I’m sure though that in time, she will. Maybe she’ll be 16, but eventually, she will sleep….right? At lease she’s cute though:




When talking about the baby constantly running her tongue over her new teeth, Bud pointed out that he also had a new baby tooth. I was all like “you do not…goofball…” but he actually does. His teeth have always been gaped, and I thought the gap in the front seemed larger recently, and was trying to get him in to the dentist for a checkup anyway. I looked in his mouth to see a molar-like tooth coming down from behind and right in between his 2 front teeth. I was moderately horrified, and called the dentist right away the next morning. They seem to think that as long as it is removed before his permanent teeth start coming in, there won’t be any permanent damage, so that’s good. We are going in to have it checked out next Monday.

Nothing is really going on with Lucy; she did have a throat type infection and was also on antibiotics, but she seems to thrive on the drama of such situations. She is on an “I want to cut my hair” kick, which makes me nervous. On one hand, how great would it be to have her hair short and low maintenance? On the other hand, she is my girl, and I love her long dark hair. The question is also raised as to should a 3-year-old be allowed to control the length of her hair? I don’t know.

It Sucks.

And it is completely unfair that babies die. I am completely overwhelmed with grief for the families of Maddie and Thalon today that I can’t even describe it. I didn’t know either of these families and to be honest, I never even read their blogs. Word travels on the internet though, and I gradually became aware of these two babies whose lives ended much too soon.



My heart goes out to each of the families.



Thinking about something happening to any of my children, whether they are 4 months, 17 months, 7 years or 25 years old kills me. I don’t know how I would go on.



I also feel selfish complaining about ear infections and sleepless nights and the rigmarole of parenting. I mean, jeeze. At least my kids are here.



The bottom line—babies shouldn’t die. Ever. At least not while their parents are around to watch.



My heart is heavy today.



Edmund, Caitlyn, Hannah—I love you.